A guide for Nikki in - How to be a good housewife

[mumblezs#1Fan]

http://i16.tinypic.com/5xgp378.jpg

:movethatass:

[undertaker]

:movethatass:


lol you so gonna get into trouble for that

[Nikki]

Luckily the days of 1955 are OVER!!! :)

[undertaker]

yea i agree nikki and nikki hi:)

[ami de nikki]

That's a good way to start a war.

I like the part "Don't greet him with complaints and problems."

Hmmmm.....I wonder what that would be like..........:blink:

[mumblezs#1Fan]

I am awaiting the thanks and gratitude from mumblez for me bringing this to Nikki's attention. :lurker

[ami de nikki]

The Mr. might want to carefully consider his comments in regards to that article. Cooould be trouble.....:grin61:

[mumblezs#1Fan]

The Mr. might want to carefully consider his comments in regards to that article. Cooould be trouble.....:grin61:

you are a shit starter! :chair2:

[ami de nikki]

you are a shit starter! :chair2:

Just been there myself, many times...!:doh1:

[kempenstein]

Here's some tips on being a great wife from an advice column I read somewhere::grin61:

Q: My husband wants to have a threesome with me and my best friend.

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing your best
friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your
skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day; then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys

A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The Man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house, too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity
training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex
should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex and cooking him a nice meal.

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep
without giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.

[ami de nikki]

:laught01:

[mumblez]

http://i16.tinypic.com/5xgp378.jpg

:movethatass:

Dude you FUCKING ROCK! I am printing this and puttin it on the fridge for sure! She needs to know her place!:hidden:

[mumblezs#1Fan]

You bet mumblez, I do want you guys to have a happy and healthy relationship. ;)

[Davey]

Umm Ill dial 911 now... Mumzy is gonna get a :chair2:

[Mrs. Kempenstein]

Get Real Honey!!! IT'S NEVER GONNA HAPPEN!! bUT i STILL LOVE YOU!!Here's some tips on being a great wife from an advice column I read somewhere::grin61:

Q: My husband wants to have a threesome with me and my best friend.

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing your best
friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex on him.

A: Do it. Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your
skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day; then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys

A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The Man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house, too)! Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.

Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity
training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex
should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should; He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex and cooking him a nice meal.

Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep
without giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.

[William_86]

aw that was mean ??

[kempenstein]

Get Real Honey!!! IT'S NEVER GONNA HAPPEN!! bUT i STILL LOVE YOU!!

I know, like you'd ever cook me a nice meal!:grin61:

[Mrs. Kempenstein]

:mrdick: Maybe one of these days honey!!!